Tired

I am sitting at my desk at school at 7:15 this morning, only my lamp on and Christian music playing on my CD player. It is very peaceful. I am trying to not think about the 130 students who are about to flow in and out of my room today. I am so tired of it all right now. Tired of teaching, grading, students, TAKS test, being exhausted when I get home. I just want so desperately to stay at home, to just be wife and mom. I am tired of giving Troy and Mason what is left of me at the end of the day. Please, God, help something to happen so can stay home. Please. I am tired.

I do like my job. I do. I like my students (most days) and I like the fact that I have a job that really matters. Teachers are so important to the world today because we are practically raising most kids. I like that I am good at my job. I like my job. But it is not what I want to do right now. I miss my family. I miss my son and now that this new baby is on the way, I have to stay at home. I just have to. Or at least get a part time job. Something. Something has to change.